Friday, November 2, 2007

Factious Fridays

Boy, oh, boy do I have some cantankerous thoughts for y'all today. Here we go:

1. The Alex Rodriguez free agency story hit the wires in the middle of game four of the World Series. Mike and Mike, Colin Cowherd, and most notably, Peter Gammons have all described it as despicable and unbelievably arrogant on the part of the slugger to disrupt and take away from the champions in such a manner.

Whatever.

Who interrupted game 4 to talk about it? Who said, "You wouldn't think the team winning the world series could be upstaged, but they have."?

Answer: Sports media.

You mean to tell me that a scenario that was well-known and long talked about came to fruition, and it's this big freakin' deal? Get a clue. Really. Get a clue.

All media outlets will tell you that they "report the news, not make the news." I simply cannot think of any better examples of "making news" than this A-Rod stupidity and the totally absurd nature of the Anna Nicole Smith coverage when she called it quits.

Bottom Line: Don't be fooled.....the media sucks. ESPN and Fox are the worst offenders of suckiness. If anyone knows of some really good sources for sports and real news, please let me know.

2. Speaking over over-hyped, it's difficult for me to let go of this Office thing.

Recorded it, watched it, and lamented the 23 minutes of my life I lost doing so (hey, at least I could fast forward through the commercials and my girls were in bed already, so I didn't lose time with them).

I know, I know. I don't have to watch it. My taste may be very different from that of everyone else, and that's fine. I'm just seriously starting to wonder if I don't understand funny anymore.

It seems to me that Steve Carrell is playing his character, Brick Tamblin, from Anchorman. He doesn't make a laugh as a main character though. So, I'll ask my question a different way....are the first three seasons of the office exactly like season four, or has the quality gone down somewhat to completely?

3. Two days ago, while picking up Liz's beautifully mounted Doctorate diploma at a local framing store, I witnessed a tall and burly man bullying a small, twenty-something, homely-looking, red-haired girl behind the counter for something that wasn't done right with his order. Apparently, there was a "scratch" on his picture frame.

He wasn't necessarily yelling, but he was definitely bullying her via body language and implied non-financial threats. This went on for about two minutes while the girl, almost in tears, was trying to do everything she could to fix the situation quickly and appropriately because there was an obvious time crunch for the immense and well-dressed man.

Maybe it's my Southern roots or my chivalry, but after a particularly nasty phrase about her physical appearance, I stepped in.

"Excuse me, Sir. I'm sorry to interrupt this private conversation between you and the other five people standing around, but I'm curious as to what you hope to accomplish by getting personal with this young lady behind the desk?"

"What?" the man astutely replied.

I expounded, "This lady has told you she can fix the frame quickly and for half the price. At what point do you plan on letting her do that? Is it after you've used your vast size to intimidate yet another person into doing what you wish? Well, maybe you have not yet encountered someone you couldn't intimidate, but my name is Cameron Clark, and I'm not intimidated.

You may take out your frustrations on me if you wish."

The eyes of the observers both behind and in front of the counter darted back and forth between my rather short body and the vast, mountain of a man, who stood looking at me with the most perplexed expression, as if I had asked him a complex astrophysics question.

When his brain gathered all of the pertinent information about the situation it could, he squinted, leaned over three inches, making him about 6'5, and said, "Do you know who I am?"

I immediately said, "I was under the impression I didn't care to whom I was talking, just like you don't seem to either." He was visibly rocked back by this response.

He stood up straight, turned to the girl behind the counter and said,"Do you think you could have that ready by 5:00?" He could not have said it more pleasantly if he were asking her out on a date.

She said, "Absolutely," and there ended the conflict. I was told later who exactly he was, and remained unassuaged by his involvement in certain professional sports.

After he left, another woman who witnessed all this told me that Ainsley, who had been standing just behind my right leg, had peered around and stared at the man with a look one might observe from an angry Lion Cub in a Disney movie; eyebrows furrowed and a pursed mouth.

It was then that I realized Ainsley had scared this man away with the same look her mother might give me if I were to show up to the house drunk and bloody from fighting. It's terrifying.

Lesson: If you stand up for what's right, and pack a fearsome toddler on your hip, you can make someone else's day a little better.

I have more, but I must go tend to my little girl, who is stirring from her nap. I don't want to get "the look."

4 comments:

Bob, Sarah, and Miriam Logsdon said...

Cam, I love it. Thanks for your..and Ainsley's story about stepping up for her. I have been in situations like that and wished that I would have spoken up. Grace and peace.

Alan said...

The vast majority of the ESPN guys are Red Sox honks so anything a non Sock does is automatically deemed to have usurped the authority of the almighty beantown bums. A-Rod's agent is Scott Boras. That's all you need to know.

That's a great story. Tease with the possibility of violence and then bring it home with some nice feel good family love. Nice. Nice.

Nicole said...

I am laughing so hard I can't breathe.The concept of packing a fearsome toddler cracks me up. My problem is that the toddler I pack has to flirt with the whole room. Not so fearsome. But then again I probably would be cowering in a corner sucking my thumb in this situation...

Unsinkable Kristen said...

You may never like The Office simply because everyone has already talked it up. No show is ever as good as it's hype, so you have to go into it thinking it'll be maybe tolerable and then you'll probably be pleasantly suprised.

As for The Office, seriously, go rent the first three seasons. Half of the humor is built around the character traits that have been progressively built up. You won't know it's funny when Pam it outspoken because you didn't see her start off like a church mouse.

Anyways, they've built up very realistic characters among very out of control characters and that's half the fun.